Day 21 Confessions of a Raw Loser

Okay jill,

good news - bad news:
The good news - i have today's post.
The bad news?
I broke.

I contemplated not telling you or anyone else. I thought for the good of the blog and to save face - I'll just pretend it never happened. Who will know, right? But this morning, I knew I'd never be able to live with the lie. Besides it's not fair to raw food - because I'd be claiming things worked or didn't work raw wise knowing that I threw a curve ball into the experiment.

While I can't divulge ALL that happened yesterday - let's just say that after seeing a sad Facebook status update, I invited a gal over for a "pick me up" chat. Soon we were sitting in the magic garden and she started to share with me how her husband has lung cancer and has been dying for the past 15 months. She hasn't slept almost as long and there's tons of drama and so of course, she's completely stressed/wacked out of her mind. Who wouldn't be, right? Wine was ingested. Too much wine for sure.

And food was needed for my guest. Pot stickers were made. She had them while I snacked on my veggie plate. By the time she left, I was chok full of complicated emotions and fears. I hobbled back up to the cabin and without thought I ate six pot stickers- one right after the other - it was beyond my control. There was no pleasure involved. No enjoyment whatsoever. Just ingestion. Call it existential apathetic eating. Call it whatever you want - bottom line is I broke and feel awful about it.

I hope it helps that I am wearing a giant scarlet L for all the world to see. And more importantly, I hope you can forgive me.

Edward wears white pants

Jill Nipper August 6 at 1:01pm

So maybe I am a LITTLE obsessed, but this new Robert Pattinson flick that I just bought actually says that my sweet Edward Cullen gives a RAW performance!!!!!

What are the odds?

Jill Nipper August 6 at 1:02pm

See? Proof that he is my soul mate.

By the way, I really loved your post last night about the wine. So funny and I just LOVE how you always seem to go back to those damn white pants. Have you ever even owned a pair?

Stacy McQueen August 6 at 1:16pm

As soon as I posted it I started to wonder if maybe the reason the last 10 days have been somewhat easy is because we can still have our glass of wine. Be funny if we ditch it and suddenly find raw food/life isn't that great after all.

Jill Nipper August 6 at 1:20pm

Yeah, see...right there... reason enough to believe that it would be a BAD idea to subject ourselves to unnecessary torture. Go Wine!!!

So you got any white pants or not?

Stacy McQueen August 6 at 1:24pm

Uh, that's a negative on the white pants. Ya know
I've never really thought about it before until
we started doing this but white pants are
the ultimate thing I would/could never do.
Not with my super ginormous ass.
It's like a symbol for the unattainable.
Like Edward.

Jill Nipper August 6 at 1:26pm

Who says Edward is unattainable????????????

Crazy bitch.